"When told that I must do a bio for the web site I simply wrote "David Crowder's bio: Crowder is a man of true mystery". I felt that was enough and adequately defined the real me, it was found unacceptable however and thus you have been subjected to this useless and quite frivolous information. Unfortunately I cannot attest to the soundness or reliability of the information previously posted in order to preserve the veracity of the mystery surrounding myself. I can confirm the verity that this is a funny story...or is it?"